bread&tea

Have you found enjoyment from or through a thing, and known the niggling yearning for a step further that hovers yet out of reach. Of course. Some well made music, the enclosure of sound and swelling of emotions... and an end. Repetition only yielding a slow retreat from the moment. A film that resonates with your upbringing and beliefs, that piques your mind, perhaps in a way the only one nearby gets is you. The aftermath of inspiration, clarity of thought, hope. Turning in for sleep in resignation. An escape outdoors, howling wind bringing a cocoon of silence in the mind. A bittersweet cold that chills unpleasantly but wonderfully invigorates. A locked away grove feeling of home. The eventuality of returning to human population. Building, creating, manufacturing, curating, spinning into existence with care some portion to bring benefit. The knowledge of entropy in action regardless of whether you continue. The simple endless pleasure of progression in an rpg,

Post camp is an interesting time. Staying up late despite exhaustion in pursuit of those few moments remaining with counselors before they disperse. Jarring out of the artificial environment of camp discipleship into old work relationships and confusions. Coming to an understanding of new convictions. Restarting the cycle of food planning-creation-cleanup. There is an age old tradition at camp, during each meal we have what's called a "nutshell". This is a small exposition of a verse or two from scripture. Towards the end of every year, I invariably turn to Hebrews 12:1-2, which follows an entire chapter referring to the faith of various believers. "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cros

Time has appeared that time is found for such a thing as this, writing. That is, in a reformed and somewhat organized fashion. Much different than defaulting to a "catch all" spiral notebook as the last years have been. Resulting in masses of paper with no organization- building diagrams, half-letters, personal reflections, game concepts, bible studies, all unkindly shoveled together. My tidy half dies as the dominant and undisciplined half shrugs and begins tomorrow's list on the next page. Urgh. We'll only end up crossing out three of those eight to-do's anyway.. Pretty sure it's claimed somewhere (which means something?) that the act of writing helps with memory, efficiency, learning, and a dozen other life-essential tasks. Whatever the case... No longer working fifty plus hours weekly as a grocer changes some life habits. It always helped to stay sane by reminding myself that zillions of people work harder and longer hours than those. Now, I happily thro