bread&tea

I've found there's a significant difference between prayer and talking to God; and reading the bible and listening to God. The difference between legalism and grace. I'll be honest, I haven't read the bible today. Nor have I (dangerously) had a dedicated prayer time. As I say that, and as I said it to myself earlier today, I find something wrong with those statements. God is in neither. Don't get me wrong here, it's good to read the bible and pray. I've simply found that my mindset becomes easily distorted towards task achieving when I refer to these two vital practices as something I do, with no mention of God in them. Of course you can achieve a godly bible study with prayer without explicitly putting God's name into the action. I've recently discovered though, that by referring to prayer as it is, talking to God, and referring to bible reading as it is, listening to God, I am constantly reminded of the real reason for why I participate in them

It may or may not be obvious, but I have had few words to say recently. Of course one can default to chalking up a list of tasks and duties and claim the excuse of having no time available, (a list I've been guilty of bringing up) but logistically, there's time. A half hour is all it takes. Maybe it's that half hour at ten-thirty that should be spent sleeping.... but it's doable. No, despite busyness, it's not the busyness' time consuming properties that limit my words, it's the lack of thought time that comes from being so busy. And while that's true, busyness does not seem to be the limiting factor of my words right now. Here's a song by MercyMe, with some amazing lyrics. Word Of God Speak The song is filled with good words and backed with some good music too. It starts and ends with these words: "I'm finding myself, at a loss for words, and the funny thing is, it's okay." I find it quite easy to get caught up in propagation

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." Romans 7:15 It is interesting (and rather unsettling) that knowledge of what to do does not mean we will do it. Easy to do the wrong thing, or what seems wrong to you, when you don't know why. And agonizingly, it is just as easy to do the same when we do know. What's the difference that keeps our priorities straight? What is it that motivates us to do what we think we want or don't want? It could be called self-discipline. I know that if I could choose five top character traits, that self-discipline would definitely be one of them. Self-discipline though, isn't really motivated. Motivation can be behind it, sure. But self-discipline is more of a choice, a steely determination and concentration of willpower. It is the result of an over-arching dream, vision, or goal. Dreams and visions are to hazy though, so I'm going to stick with goals, and personal desire. Som

Latest realization. Life is kind of like Tetris. Yep, it's time for another analogy. But Tetris? Yeah. Of course there's things wrong with it just like all analogies, but here goes some of my observations. We encounter many unique problems and situations in life, and no shares the exact position of another. When we mess up, it does no good to dwell on our mistakes, they are done. What is still to come is all we can hope to utilize in a better way. After finishing something, (like a line) it is good to remember that it too, is done. Our lives are short, and despite whatever we may do, we will all die in the end. To look behind us and dwell on the past in either regret or pride is a dangerous thing indeed. Although we only see one piece of the puzzle at a time, which we can only try to use as best we can, the giver of each piece knows precisely why they gave it to us. We often get a piece preview if we are faithful and true, and pray for direction. It is never more than a s

What a special experience. Not to sum up the movie in one gasp, but for me as a music lover, August Rush definitely made a splash. That's because August Rush is all about music. How it is heard, how it is made, how it is experienced. Probing into the subject of what music really is. Though I'll leave the story details for you to discover yourself, the plot mechanics aren't to bad. It's a fine performance of what could very well happen in real life. Thankfully, while keeping that realism alive, August Rush never revels in the dark parts of humanity. There's a small amount of romantic material, and about eight swear words, which are mostly in one scene. What else can I say....Hm. It would help if I didn't mind telling about what happens in the movie. Part of the experience is just seeing a different life played out though. If the future is known, it takes the excitement out of things. At least it does for me. August Rush was a particularly fresh breath of

Love is not casually interested. Probably the most important thing I learned this week. Christ works through me to love the world, because I don't love it, and his love is not casually interested. Christ in me is nothing new, just the realization about love. That statement raises some interesting thoughts for me. In the world of today, words are not so influential as actions. I still use them of course, because I believe words in a longhand, personal way, are gaining more impact than they used to. Partially due to inflation of shorthand writing, and other reasons, like the rarity of more complete expression. The world actually demands more complete expression now, as anything short of that is simply not to be believed. Climbing out of that rabbit hole, my actions are not as loving as I would like them to be all the time. And part of that, is that I am not making myself more than "interested" in other people. Here's a secret that shouldn't be one. True Christ

Here is a poem I wrote, that I like quite a bit. It's technically pretty terrible, and completely unstructured, as it jumps through about three different stylistic structures. About three different sections to it because of that. However, I wrote it from the "inside out" as one of my instructors and/or mentor likes to say it. Comments appreciated, as always. Titled, "Heads Full Of Heart" Why do I run? From that which I care most for? Or what is it I run from? Why, is it to be feared? To whom then do I run? Or to what or the where? If none can replace that which I flee, Then why do I run, I plead. The answer, not needed, It is already known, The disease unheeded, To its master goes, Yet knowledge of diseases, Can do nothing on its own, So the running is no mystery, But the question remains, And while the answer has been given, The problems still the same, Believing the lies, and forgetting the name. These questions with answers, They still have pain,